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Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Up Late With To Do's and Frustrations

That is why I've been notably lacking from posting. Very busy and life has been a series of, "Well craps". You know those days.

A Couple weeks ago we decided to do some furniture shifting while I had the aquarium half empty for cleaning. We got it all taken care of but I started to notice the aquarium seemed to be losing water. Friday morning we woke up to find that it was indeed leaking. Now, I had not allotted my already tightly budgeted time to deal with this so I made a mad dash to Petco (We won't discuss the disaster that was) only to find they didn't have what I needed or maybe more to the point, wanted. So I came home to see if I could eek the tank through while I ordered what I wanted. And my computer imploded on itself like a small but disastrous supernova of electronic armageddon. Today is the first day that the new tank is up and going and I have a fully functional computer (I have a new Mac!) and I seem to have gotten the hang of using it all. We won't even discuss the issues I had procuring an aquarium, setting said aquarium up, procuring the computer and the joys of home networking, re-learning how to use macs after a decades absence from them and all the fun times between such as working everyday since.

Due to this and having some spare time today I decided to try to catch up on Blogs and Forums I have missed in my absence. I shouldn't have.

One of the first forums I went into was someone who was upset about a posting on Facebook from a friend that showed their child in an embarrassing bathroom situation. I agree with her and stated as such since she had already had several detractors that I agree we need to respect our children's privacy on social media. Oooh boy, wrong thing to do.

Now, to be honest, I don't like Facebook nor do I have an account. I had a myspace account I closed down ASAP that was required for school because of mainly the lack of respect or common sense I saw displayed there. Facebook to me seems like a proliferation of the same behaviors by and large. I understand that some people use it just like I use my blog, but I don't feel the need to partake, and in fact feel as though the Social Media movement has taken us away as a culture from socializations in general. I have seen people forego normal interactions for those online on a regular basis and as someone in costumer service situation regularly have had to quash the desire to reach out and take iPads, phones and other devices from people and make them have eye contact with me.

This was in a forum that I like to go to. In fact, I love it dearly, but I know it's a forum. It's a group of online individuals whom I don't know. I understand it's written communication that often lacks inflection and sometimes easy to offend, but right now I'm thinking about drawing out of it because of the reaction I got. Many of these people I have liked their postings before, some I know were being funny and trying to de-tension the feeling of the forum but one in particular that asked if I always "Mansplain" my posts really pissed me off, as well as someone who told me I was being condescending when trying to clarify my view points. So, I left and came here to get it out so I can move on and not feel so worked up. I'm just curious if the one that asked me if I mans plain talks like that to her husband (she is married, I looked these users up)? That strikes me as incredibly sexist, which I often get that feel with it being a fiber related site since most users are female. Maybe I'm just being sensitive since my hackles are obviously up over this whole issue. As far as the other one, to consider someone trying to clarify their view point condescending? I think it's condescending to assume you are going to state your opinion in a forum and expect we all agree with you.

As I tried to state there, I think a lot of the confusion is a lack of common language association when it comes to online sites. Just because you've friended someone online, doesn't mean your friends. Well, it doesn't in the my world. On this site, yes I have many people who have "friended me", but I'm not friends with most of them. In fact, most I don't even know. We don't exchange regular email, we don't call each other or send each other Christmas cards. Hell, if i walked into a room with these people in it I couldn't identify most of them. We're website friends, but not real world friends, so why would I let them see pictures of myself, or my loved ones in possibly embarrassing or compromising positions that they can share to all their e-world friends who can continue the chain of passing them on?

To me a friend is someone who can call me when they're in need, or I them. We're shoulders to cry on, and support even when we need it ourselves whether it's monetary, emotional, or physically. That's what you do for friends. They are the family we chose to be around instead of the family we were born to, and some of us are lucky enough that those two groups mingle. Not a group of internet strangers that pushed a button that sent me a "This user has friended you, would you like to be their friend?" text box, and I'll be damned if someone tries to make me feel like I'm not living a full life because I don't have 5,000 fake friends that tout pictures of my kids that when they turn 10 are going to be horrified you have a picture of them pooping in unsanctioned locations. I have a few very good friends that I would give my life for, some of them that read this blog, and a lot of internet acquantences that when I know something bad is happening in their life, I try to keep them in my thoughts and prayers. Some of my friends I have even met online.

The internet is not a bad scary place where evil lurks around every corner, but just think before posting something, "Would I say or do this in person, or want people to see me in this light?". Especially before posting things about others. The internet is a great thing if handled with respect and integrity. It's an entertainment, it's a social link to loved ones, and it's a tool for business's of all shapes and sizes, but it can do great harm as well. Just look here, I am using it to communicate with my loved ones, and some may disagree with what I say and it may cause family discord. It's a two edged sword and all users should be aware of that when they are on it. That's what I'm trying to say.

Okay, off to bed with me. Hope you all have a great night and sleep tight.


  1. Hear, Hear! Well said. I may spend time on-line and chat with good friends whom I've met there but face-to-face interactions with good friends can't be beat. Take care -Joe

  2. indeed...will have to try and chat live soon. i do miss the verbal communication in this computer world! had someone get snarky with me when i simply answered a question on a live stream of the iditarod finish. some people are just mean. totally agree on some people needing to think before posting pictures of their kids pooping and what not. my neice posted a picture of the big gob of ear wax they pulled out of her was disgusting. i nearly puked. must we share all??

  3. Heater fixed, tried to call back but I have wrong number.hopefully we can catch up again soon!

    1. Glad to hear it! Would hate to have cold dogs and cats. I will call you and leave my number on your machine.