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Wednesday, August 17, 2011

He's finally at it again... some people.

First… Thanks everyone! 500 visits! That gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. A dry one though, not like the feeling of peeing myself or anything. Well, it’s been a great many years since I’ve done that myself so maybe it does feel like that… I was dreaming I was swimming in a lake and you can just pee in a lake. It’s not a pool, so I just, ooohhhhhhh but I digress. Seriously digress. So sorry. Thanks everyone!

I apologize that it has been a bit since an update. I’ve been kinda down and out for the last month. Got a bit sick after the retreat and never perked back up. It went through not only the department I work in a bit but also the facility. Left us unlucky ones a bit wrung out. But I’m getting there. I seem to be having some late onset homesickness as well so I think mentally I’m a bit down currently, but I won’t whine too much here.

On a good note, I have got some knitting done. A few months back I was asked if I would be willing to provide hats for a neighboring community’s hospital. I’ve been hacking into my stash for left over project yarn and have been trying to provide a few hats a month. July got away from me and I didn’t get any done, but I have a nice big batch ready to go now. In fact, I have the last one almost done as my fingers hack this out on the keyboard.

Of all the knitting I could have chosen to leap back in with, it’s downright good mood knitting. I don’t know what it is about knitting baby things that even makes me the yard ape, scrotum rat hater feel good. But it does. Maybe it’s because it’s for a good cause, maybe because it’s stash busting, but I think of it as karma recharging. For all those things that fly out of my mouth… don’t worry, I have a good one for you from yesterday, it helps tip the karma scale back over just a bit. This means my fall will be a little more gentle, or blessedly short?. Yes, I said fall. No matter how much karma knitting I do, I can’t make up for all of the things I say, think, or do. No betting, just take my word for it.

As an example, yesterday: I’m in the middle of my night shifts. Not an excuse, just a bit of mood lighting as I set the scene. So I got up, dragged on some clothes and took the kids to the river. Got soaking wet and begged treats off old ladies (the dogs did, not me I swear. Treats off old lady’s makes me sound like some kind of gigolo for the senior citizens). Then we hit Walmart, one of my favorite places to go (are you getting the sarcasm here? Good) before heading towards the vet to buy Sullivan’s new prescription diet. Don’t even ask me how much a prescription diet costs for a Great Dane. Ungrateful Mongrel. As I approach the vet coming down the hill, flip on the signal and downshift in my little four on the floor. I glanced in the mirror and saw the black SUV crest the hill and gain on me fast, but hey, I have to turn so they’ll either change lanes or slow down and there was plenty of room. Before I can make the turn she’s on my butt and follows me into the lot. I can honestly say she’s well over the posted 40 as she approached me. I wrestle just the Great Delay from the car stuffed with four dripping beasts and go in giving her room in case she has a vet emergency. I would have been driving like that if it was some kind of crisis with one of my critters. Been there done that baby. But she’s taking her time getting out from behind the wheel so I go in, and while at the counter awaiting the debit card busting bag of food, she steps up behind me (it was kind of a crowded lobby and I had the doofus in a sit and stay beside me) announces her views on my driving practices.

“You know you really shouldn’t downshift to slow down before braking because your brake lights don’t come on and the rest of us can’t tell you’re slowing and might hit you.”

At which several things went through my head… First I thought, well, if you weren’t so far over the speed limit you would have proper time to react to changes in traffic patterns. Then I thought, I like my brakes very much and downshifting is a very legal method of slowing ones car and I ‘m pretty sure you would have been ticketed for unsafe driving practices before I. Then I thought, are you really that stupid? And I ran with it, and as the following made it past my lips I heard that voice in the back of my head screaming “Nooooooooooooooooo.” But it was too late.

“You know you really shouldn’t say such things because the rest of us can’t tell if you’re really that stupid or just pretending to be.”

Then there was that little silence as she gave me that dumb look that women of a certain class do when you respond other than in the apologetic manner they were expecting and feel is their god given right. And into that silence came the front desk staff of the clinic who know me quite well. Seriously, we’re there all the time. I could afford so much more in life if I didn’t insist on having dogs. One giggled and the other one who knows me better came around the desk, took the lady by the elbow and escorted her to an empty room. God Bless Deb.

I'll have hat pics tomorrow. Now, I'm going to bed. I still have to work tonight after all.

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